
My husband loves that I turn 64 today because he can say he’s married to an older woman…for two months. He works it. Paul McCartney sang “Will you still need me, will you still feed me?” when he was 16 years old…for his father’s 64th birthday. When Macca was 64 he had lost love of his life, Linda, to cancer and was in the process of a second divorce. His kids fooled around with the lyrics a bit and sang it as a surprise for him at his party.
The significance of 64 is that it’s old. I’m old. Not officially according to google. That happens at age 65. I like to get a head start on things. Old is not bad. It’s really very good. We made it this far! We get freedoms we’ve never had and can choose a new life direction if so inclined. I stopped believing the negative stereotypes of “old” a few years ago when I let my hair go gray and the worry about my weight and attractiveness simply fell away. No big deal. Especially in Florida. Where I get to live now in winter and soon maybe all the time. When I’m not traveling the world with my younger husband.
In preparation for this birthday, I’ve been reading “Women Rowing North” by Mary Pipher. She asks us older folk to think about what sustains and enriches us going forward. And then do that. Pipher says old age is a time of “vibrant living” and it’s true. All the cares of busy adulthood really do fall away if you’ve planned it right. Or in my case because my husband planned it right. I got to retire early from teaching and write books. It’s what I’ve always wanted to do and I did it! I read novels instead of student essays these days. As many as I want, whenever I feel like it. I have a library full of books I’ve saved through the years so that when I was old I could reread them. The time is now. I’m happiest with a book in my hand.

Like Pipher, I plan to navigate life’s currents and flourish as I age. It’s true that older women are devalued in our society, but that doesn’t bother me. I know my worth. I’ve done my work, raised my children, written my books, made connections that have lasted most of my life. I’m content with how my life has turned out. Friendships sustain me and my spouse is a safe harbor. My grandchildren are a special delight. Words can’t do those little lives justice. We are traveling to see Ben in April and Owen and Julia in May. Because we can. Other people’s schedules no longer hold us down. We make our own schedules now.
Even if you’ve never been inclined to get to know your body before, with old age the skin and what’s in it won’t be ignored. It likes to be walked like a dog and stretched and flexed like a cat. It needs attention and wants to be fully inhabited. For me, yoga works. Old bodies are not happy being used and abused. If you put something into your body at age 64 that it does not want, it will tell you. You have to honor that. I’m working on it.
Every life is a work in progress, and at 64 I’m taking a step back from the canvas to appreciate the beauty of this birthday gift. Thanks for being here with me today!
Wonderful and happiest of birthdays. I’ll be 62 this year and look forward to this exciting next phase of my life)
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Thank you Beth! The book I mentioned by Mary Pipher was a happy surprise for me. She showed me how to reframe the word “old” in a positive way. Not sure I would have thought to do that on my own!
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This is a wonderful, positive look at the aging process. Have a great birthday and a healthy/happy upcoming year, Cynthia!
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Thank you, Becky 🙂 I think it was May Sarton who said “old age is not interesting until one gets there” She’s right and I am and it is!
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I feel the same way (most of the time:)
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Happy birthday! I’m glad you’re in such a good place in your life.
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Thanks Lydia. Yes my star is on the upswing just now. One of the things Mary Pipher said that I couldn’t fit into this post was “There is an ancient and almost universal cycle that involves trauma, despair, struggle, adaptation and resolution.” Today I resolve to keep a positive outlook whenever I can.
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Happy Birthday! Enjoy the sunny side of your sixties! It goes fast!
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Thank you, Jan. If it is any consolation it’s cold here in Michigan too. No flowers blooming ’round here yet. xo
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Happy Birthday. I can’t believe I’m 66 – nor can my 93 year old mother believe her eldest is 66!
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Thank you ❤ And bless your mom! I just had a son turn 40 and it does feel strange. We're both lucky to have parents still with us.
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A belated happy birthday my friend! Well said…you put into beutiful words excatly how I feel too…I just needed the reminder today! I am babysitting for my 7 month old granddon this week and am feeling it! And living it too…because I can!
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Hi Brenda!! You are so lucky to have a baby grandchild close to home. I love when they are small ❤ At the same time, I know what you mean. After a visit with my grandkids, my body is sore in places I didn't previously know existed. 🙂 Miss you and the Florida writers. xo
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Happy Birthday to my beautiful & talented niece,posted it on FB even tho your’e not there,miss you & all the up dates LOVE YOU !! Just found your blog so sorry this is late
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Thanks Aunt Wese! I just found your comment a month later!
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I enjoyed your post. I am heading for 61, and am doing as much if not more than I was doing 20 years ago.
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I’m not quite as busy but I am a whole lot happier than I was 20 years ago. Thanks, Maria 😁
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