Sitting here writing about changing my life with advice from a self-help book when I feel as if that’s an impossible task. It’s almost as if someone snatched away the me I used to be, and frankly, all I want to do is get her back. Where did the Cindy who loved yoga and writing go? When did my resolve to eat healthfully disappear? I’m reading STICK WITH IT as a last-ditch effort. The book bases its premise on an acronym SCIENCE and does claim that all the advice is science-based. Since last report I’ve read two more chapters and actually made some progress. Did some backsliding, too.
I’ve already written about stepladders and community in previous posts. This past week I felt I needed a super dose of help so I tackled “Important” and “Easy.” I can sum up those two chapters swiftly. “Important” is all about priorities. If you think the change you want to make is important, you’ll try harder to make it and keep it. Sean Young, the author, sites a study about the three most important things in many people’s lives.
Money, health, and relationships are the top three. Turns out, as long as you’re not destitute, money isn’t important to health or happiness. People with money can still get death sentence diseases or be clinically depressed. People with lots of money are often miserable in their relationships.
It’s easy to think “if I just had X amount of dollars, all would be well.” I’ve thought that myself many times. One of the changes I’d like to make is in my health. “If I hired a chef, I’d be able to eat better with less effort. I’d also be able to hire a private yoga teacher.” All true but I can see that money wouldn’t take away temptation as far as cake goes and if I didn’t feel like working out, a coach wouldn’t motivate me to do it. I’d just cancel. Health has to be important enough to me to change my eating and exercise habits for the better.
My other goal is to finish my book. I actually did complete a writing project that was on my to-do list. To get my books on audio, I had to fill out five spec sheets, choosing a section of each story to be narrated. After weeks of procrastinating, I got it done this past week. So that’s what I mean…this self-help method is working to a point. But all the money in the world can’t conjure that spark of hot desire that compels me to tell a story and get it in great shape for my editor’s eyes. But, since it’s important to me, partly because of the writing communities I’ve been a part of for so long, I am determined to get it done this summer.
So much for “important.” Next is “Easy” and I do know that “easy” helped me start a yoga practice again. I simply loaded Gaia onto my computer and with a couple of clicks and a move from chair to floor, I’m ready to go. No special equipment or clothing needed. No trip in the car to the yoga studio. “Easy” works for me as far as exercise goes.
Eating the right food is a bit more complicated. Fast food is easy. The stocking, preparing and cooking of whole nutritious food takes way more energy. Stepladders (that first helpful hint in SCIENCE) breaks down difficult or complex tasks, which does make them easier. I’m still working with my goal of eating right. And I’m trying not to bask too long in the glory of finishing the tasks for the audio books.
I have a set of steps for completing the book project, too. Meanwhile I’m still reading. I’ve done S, C, I, and E. I can’t wait to see what the heck N is all about. Neurohacks. Hmmm. Something with the brain, I suspect. SCIE/NCE. Maybe I can get this book finished by next weeks so I’ll have all the tools necessary to implement my goals.
I can totally relate to how you feel, Cindy. I’ve struggled more than usual this past year with lack of self-care and I’m a self-help author so I feel doubly guilty!!! Your post struck a nerve as there are quite a few of us who feel this way at the moment. I like to blame it on the moon as this helps me believe the cycle will pass. Good luck to you. I’m going to check out that book too as it sounds interesting.
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Hi Shelley, I have been wondering if it’s my age. I’m 62. I’m thinking maybe I’m in a bigger transition period than just the usual getting off track. I want to honor the passes life takes me through, but I also want to be making decisions about how that will look, even if it takes a little push or its a bit difficult to do what those things that are truly in my heart. Thanks for stopping by. The jury is still out on Stick With It … I’m going to finish it this week. And I’m going to look up your work, too:)
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Same here with the introspection about where I am in my life and how I got here. It has been a long process – over 3 years at this time – and I couldn’t do it without the support/expertise of my osteopath and massage therapist. Funny thing this summer is that I feel major transitions – in my body and in my thinking. I am still working things through as body and mind shift. It’s good to read about the journeys of other women so I know I am not in this alone.
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Our voices are too few, Sharon. I am always looking for novels featuring older women and rarely finding them. Novels have always been a way for me to process life and feel less alone and confused about it all. Looking back to “50 Something” (Doesn’t that seem forever ago?) I’d love to find a community like that with blogs and essays about the 60s and beyond.