Maybe I’m morbid but I have a habit of thinking doomsday scenarios whenever the slightest hiccup happens in my life. For example the latest episode with my knee buckling and me not being able to walk or stand or wear most of my shoes or practice yoga or dance. My favorite dance is the Twist and I just know my twisted knee would not like it. I sigh to think that the Twist may be firmly in my past.
So that would be the doomsday version. To never do any of those things again. There are other things that are worse than temporarily losing the use of a leg. Losing the use of both legs. Completely. Forever. After all, I’m not even sure this is any big deal. Specialist said wait another week, take it easy, and if the knee doesn’t get better, we’ll do an MRI. Leaving his office, my leg buckled suddenly and I almost did a splat on the asphalt. Thank you 20 years of yoga for helping me keep a wobbly balance in airplane pose. It didn’t look as pretty as this but you get the idea.
Not being able to do everything I want to do right now is messing with my head. It’s only been two weeks. So, one more week of inactivity. I’m trying to look on the bright side. I can still read and write. I simply cannot vacuum or dust or rush about running dozens of errands in a day. I cannot take a walk in the park. I have to keep meals simple and maybe hire a cleaning service, which really, if I’m honest, seems like a perk.
I realize this is all very frivolous, the silliest part is feeling bereft about not being able to wear my summer sandals, at least the ones with cute heels. Ah well. The worst possible outcome is surgery. I feel pretty confident that I will be able to practice yoga (all the poses, not just airplane) again and yes even dance. The Twist. In heels.
I will climb Mt. Cynthus…which is a very small mountain, more like a hill, really. Greece and the tiny island of Delos is my next big life adventure. A highlight of the Sensational 60s! So this time I’m dropping the doom and gloom as usually it turns out to be nothing and I’m embarrassed for being overly dramatic. I mean, there are worse things than having to buy new shoes. If it comes to that.
A favorite Kate Bush song is my new anthem: “Running up that hill with no problem.”
I have everything crossed that time will solve the knee problem. I have had trouble with one of mine in the past, and touch wood, it behaves itself quite well these days…
Meanwhile, you have a bonefide excuse for time out, try to enjoy it!
Best wishes to you (and the knee)
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Jaye, this is true. I have heard from so many people who have had the knee issue and it makes me feel more confident that it is no big deal because everyone tells me it is not. And yes I can finally sit back and do what I love to do–read and & write:)
Your concerns are not frivolous. I’ve been thinking of you:) Sending good thoughts for a good report after you’ve given your knee a good rest.