Why Write?
People write books for mysterious reasons. They think they “have an idea.” But for me, it turns out to be a bit more complex than that. My latest release, at least in part, was written as a do-over. I was once a single mom. I keep the true story of that time here. It won a local award and was published in a national anthology because being a single mom is not easy and overcoming hardship makes good story.
I got the idea to write a novel about divorce and how difficult it can be on children (and the adults who are supposedly the mature ones). It would have a happy ending like my own story did, but it wouldn’t sugarcoat the devastation of divorce. When I added an addiction subplot, my publisher wisely decided to market the book as “contemporary fiction” and not romance like my other books.
Divorce is not romantic. Neither is addiction.
Before I embarked on this project I asked permission from the men in life: my husband and two sons. Not because there would be one true detail in this novel but because there would be an eventual husband and two little boys figured prominently in the single mom’s life. That is where reality stopped and imagination took over.
The relief of writing a better journey than my own was immediate and lasting. Healing, even. Of course fiction needs conflict and the small problems of the lovers were supplemented by an equally fictional ex-husband, who I made a terrible addict. That was not something I’d wish on my own ex-husband, who hardly takes a drink of alcohol let alone any other substances. Sure, the real guy, the father of my children, might not like the fictional ex-husband’s role in my book, but it had to be done for the sake of the story.
I’m pretty sure my ex does not read my books anyway. And no, I didn’t ask his permission. This is fiction I’m writing, although in the thick of it, it feels very real. I used real feelings. My own and and those I could clearly read on my sons’ sad faces those many years ago. Writers use emotion the way actors do. It’s a tool and we manipulate it.
That doesn’t sound very nice, but then there are zillions of articles that talk about how writers aren’t good people, that they’ll use anyone and anything if it serves their story. I take exception to that idea. It’s because I don’t want to hurt the real people in my actual life that I don’t write memoir. I make up the people in my novels.
So why write? For the pleasure of a do-over. For revenge. For absolution. To right wrongs, to dive deep into my peculiar fascination with the human psyche, to create order from chaos, to control the actions on the page so I can let go in real life, where there is no such thing as control, or anyway very little of it. And maybe, to walk a mile in somebody else’s shoes and learn, through this exercise in empathy, how to love a little better.
What about money and fame and glory?
Nah. I wouldn’t bet on those things if I were a young writer. They may come, but the odds are not in your favor. The odds of becoming a happier person, content in a world of your own building, now that is a distinct possibility.
The odds of ‘… becoming a happier person…’ are in your favour Cynthia, thank you for this lovely post exploring the possibility of walking in another’s shoes and developing empathy/compassion.
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You’re welcome Susan but I suspect most people would like the cash, lol.
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Great post, Cynthia! I have wondered all of these things. I like what you said about not writing memoirs. I do dream of one day writing a good book about my hometown, but as fiction. You have to push the conflict hard, but it is fiction, and people need to realize they characters are not based on real people.
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I don’t know about you Nicci but my real life surpasses what is believable in fiction in every way!
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I agree with you entirely – write because it will make you a happier person and for no other reason!
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Yes, Jan, i think when you start early it just feels natural. Most writers have day jobs that pay the bills. It’s like any kind of artist. Only a few really get to do it for a living. Fewer still get rich from it. The desire has to come from inside, not out there.
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That’s when I quit writing, when I don’t enjoy it anymore.
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Jaye and I have done many jobs and things over the years, but nothing beats writing!
We would actually pay ( joking!) to do it…
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Haha, I think I do end up paying more than I earn! There’s the blog to upkeep and the postcards to have printed and the ad to take out in Book Bub. Stuff adds up. Now to break even. That’s my goal:)
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Good idea. There are plenty if divirce mums and dads out there now.
Evelyn
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I was thinking that, Evelyn. It’s about 50% here in US.
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