The Plan

For about a month now, I have been working every day on a non-fiction project with a good friend. Yes, I am collaborating. Something I thought I’d never, ever do. But it is going well and I’m glad to be attached to this particular project for a variety of reasons dear to my heart. Too soon to talk specifics, but we are calling it The Plan for now. Just a place-holder name.

Meanwhile, my unfinished novel sits in the drawer taking a nap. I’d like to figure out a way to work on both projects, a little bit every day. But then I think, well, I’m getting edits from my publisher 12/1/12 or so for Blue Heaven, and the holidays are coming, and etc etc. I do have a critique group meeting on 12/1/12 and I need to bring them something from the novel. So I have at least that to keep me somewhat into the unfinished novel (also very dear to my heart!).

Feeling a little torn. But really, I love my life right now. I get to pick my projects, I have a publishing house working to get my next release ready, the blog has a new look, I have three published books with a fourth coming soon and a fifth in the pipeline. Life is good for the moment.

Been reading lots of novels with death as a theme. It came to me that the reason so many people over 50, or over 60, are depressed is more than just “the kids never visit, they never call” — it’s because they are on the other side of life, looking at their accomplishments or lack thereof and possibly feeling sad about not fulfilling their dreams.

My dreams didn’t turn out exactly like I planned. (Who plans on an information superhighway in 1980? Not me.) But they have come to fruition in new ways and that make me happy. I knew it the minute I started this blog. The fire to “be published” began to cool. I felt published, even though blogging is self-publishing. For me, the happy feeling, the reward, is the same. I don’t blog because I need to promote my novels. I blog because I love feeling connected to other writers.

So the other side of 50 is working for me. I am still amazed that I teach college. If my high school yearbook had a motto, under my picture it would have said “most likely to burn out fast.” Or “least likely to succeed.” And at the time I believed those things to be true. That they are the opposite of true amazes and humbles me. Feeling grateful today. Hope you all are too.